Susan does a lot to help me function, but it\u2019s unreasonable for anyone, especially me, to expect her to read and respond to whatever I am scribbling or typing.<\/p>\n
Susan is my wife, not my editor or co-author.\u00a0<\/strong>Yes, we have worked together on the Tameri Guide for Writers<\/a>, but not on specific projects.<\/p>\n I write alone, yes. In a burst of energy, I can write thousands of words. Once those words are written, however, I need a reviewer, an editor, an honest critic willing to ask the questions I overlooked.<\/p>\n Never discount the value of editors.<\/strong><\/p>\n I\u2019ve always known I get projects done with a collaborator or collaborators. Not co-authors, but people acting as those honest critics.<\/p>\n That\u2019s one of the great things about writing scripts: actors and directors are more than willing to read a script and give feedback. Development is part of the process for stage and screen. Actors will tell you when a line stinks. Directors will tell you when the pacing fails to connect.<\/p>\n If often feels like Susan is the only adult person in my life, especially during this pandemic. I\u2019ve talked a lot to one colleague in education, but nobody else with any regularity.<\/p>\n It\u2019s ironic that I\u2019m not social, but I need to sit down with someone and talk through my writing to get things done.<\/p>\n Some of the successful writers I have met pay for an editor, a dramaturg, or another form of collaborator.<\/strong><\/p>\n I suppose that\u2019d be an option if I had resources. In other words, if I had had some success, I could pay for the assistance for more success.<\/p>\n Personally, I\u2019d rather work with a friend or colleague who has a genuine interest in my works and share in whatever rewards that might bring.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not false modesty to state that I know I can write. What I can\u2019t do is stay on track. That might be my autistic traits, my ADHD, or something else, but it haunts me.<\/p>\n My lack of productivity depresses me, and that\u2019s not healthy.<\/p>\n What about the blog posts and published columns? Those are short. The columns have deadlines. It also doesn\u2019t hurt that writing a monthly column is a paid gig. The blog posts are often what I write when I\u2019m stalled out on something else, and many of the blog posts I start linger, unfinished for now.<\/p>\n It\u2019s amazing how getting paid for meeting deadlines can motivate a writer.<\/strong> I\u2019ve wondered how much that motivated the great serialized writers, such as Charles Dickens or Arthur Conan Doyle.<\/p>\n Even being a student helped me get projects done. The power of deadlines with consequences. How pitiful that consequences activate a laser-like focus on deadlines.<\/p>\n Artificial deadlines, self-imposed with no guaranteed payoff, have no motivational value for me. That\u2019s sad.<\/p>\n I need to focus. I need to believe there is a payoff.<\/p>\n Most of my \u201cdown\u201d moods relate to 1) not having a career; and 2) not finishing projects.<\/p>\n I\u2019m trying desperately to focus on all the projects scattered about, physically and virtually. I have websites that date back to 1994 that I really, really want to update and expand. Manuscripts to finish. Plays and movies I\u2019d love to produce.<\/p>\n To finish things would take months of solid focus on one or two things until those were completed (enough) to move on. Instead, I start and go full-speed for a few weeks until I\u2019m derailed.<\/p>\n I fear leaving behind nothing but \u201cwhat might have been\u201d projects.<\/p>\n I create a writing schedule… it slips. I try to maintain focus on the podcast, or the blogs, or something else. I get overwhelmed, distracted, sidetracked by life.<\/p>\n Maybe I need a physical chore chart.<\/strong> Five writing goals per week. I ignore the digital lists. I tag things to do, and never quite get there. I have more than 100 blog posts started but not posted. I find a book, article, or something online and tag it for later. My Later folder has four years or more of ideas.<\/p>\n Even updating existing projects stalls out.<\/p>\n Thousands of old blog posts to migrate. Novels, plays, short stories, movie scripts, poetry collections. Projects stashed away in boxes and stored on my computer.<\/p>\n I started to work on an idea, and then realized I cannot do what I had envisioned. Changing the idea or moving on to a different version is difficult for me.<\/p>\n If I had a someone to nudge me along by reading and giving feedback – that might help.<\/strong> Setting my own deadlines hasn\u2019t worked. It\u2019s sad, but I fear I need some external motivation. Sort of like the\u00a0National Novel Writing Month<\/a> helps some people write a novel draft.<\/p>\n Unfortunately, I don\u2019t have close friends, colleagues, or connections with whom I could move some of these projects forward.<\/p>\n It\u2019s important to find supports and mentors before it\u2019s too late to be productive.<\/p>\n Reaching out to friends and colleagues isn\u2019t easy for me, but it is something I need to do more often. I want to complete things so I can feel better about myself and the projects.<\/p>\n I\u2019m not going to leave only unfinished manuscripts and notebooks behind.<\/p>\n I am not giving up. I am a writer.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Susan does a lot to help me function, but it\u2019s unreasonable for anyone, especially me, to expect her to read and respond to whatever I am scribbling or typing. Susan is my wife, not my editor or co-author.\u00a0Yes, we have worked together on the Tameri Guide for Writers, but not…<\/p>\n