{"id":213,"date":"2015-01-06T08:30:00","date_gmt":"2015-01-06T13:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.tameri.com\/wordpress\/autisticme\/?p=213"},"modified":"2023-11-26T16:33:09","modified_gmt":"2023-11-26T22:33:09","slug":"end-of-semester-reflections","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tameri.com\/autisticme\/2015\/01\/06\/end-of-semester-reflections\/","title":{"rendered":"End of Semester Reflections"},"content":{"rendered":"

For the last few months I haven’t had much time for blogging, or even quiet reflection on life. This was an overwhelming semester<\/strong><\/em>, and I am surprised that I managed to function through the last 16 weeks without total collapse. Partial collapse has followed, though.<\/p>\n

This semester was too much. I love teaching, and I enjoy most students, but there was a lot happening with an in-class conflict among some students. A complication with teaching (and many other professions) is that you cannot discuss the things that aren\u2019t going well when privacy issues are involved.<\/p>\n

As a generality though, when a student has issues it does interfere with the other students in a course. You might want to help a student with challenges, but the student also has to want a positive resolution. The college experience is tough enough, but when a student needs help and doesn\u2019t seek it\u2026. I\u2019m just sad. It\u2019s depressing to watch a student harm the academic experiences of other young people. Even supportive deans and colleagues can only do so much.<\/p>\n

Some of my colleagues don\u2019t understand (and cannot be fully informed) of the student situation. What I\u2019ve learned about the path of destruction a student can leave in other courses astounds me.<\/p>\n

While enduring the difficult teaching experience, I worried a lot about my wife. My wife is well, but she had plenty of medical exams and tests. It is true that you worry more about loved ones than yourself.<\/p>\n

Teaching an overload schedule, with a new course and course I was refining, meant endless hours preparing materials and grading papers, even with teaching assistants and my wife helping. The hardest part was teaching three classes back-to-back, three days a week. It takes a toll on the voice and the mind. I had four total courses, trying to build a safety-net for my family.<\/p>\n

High school teachers manage<\/strong>. I admire them, with the work they do every day. Universities are different, though, so I believe the work evens out. Teaching is tiring at all grade levels.<\/p>\n

I managed a few autism-related appearances and continued to work with a local nonprofit organization. I did my best to remain active while teaching. Still, I am not as active in the disability community as others might like. Readers of this blog know that I am not a non-stop activist.<\/p>\n

What I needed was not more involvement or engagement, but less. I needed time to recharge and relax<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

You must take care of yourself. Always. I made a calculated risk, trying to earn as much as I could knowing there would be a price. Sadly, the price might be higher than anticipated.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not at my best. Both deans have told me few teachers ever have the sort of experience I\u2019ve had. That\u2019s only a little comfort. My visiting professorship will expire and I\u2019ll need to decide: teach part-time again somewhere or pursue one of the other credentials that might open new doors.<\/p>\n

When I am asked if my life is different or difficult because of my traits, I generally say life is complex, period. My coworkers are at least as busy as I am, and many have families and other obligations. My life is actually pretty routine. I teach, I grade, I write a bit, and I dream of having more time for hobbies.<\/p>\n

No more semesters like this. A few too many surprises. I want change again, but I\u2019m uncertain what that change should be. Ideally, more time alone to create and to learn in peace.<\/p>\n

I want to be a tenure-track professor. I also realize that one disruption in my class, one student incident, has reminded me that we don\u2019t have complete control over the classrooms in which we teach.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a gnawing sense that universities could do more to help students with challenges of all types. I do not know what more my institution could have or should have done. And I know at least one other instructor had a similar experience with the same student and also paid a long-term price.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not teaching during the summer and would likely avoid overload schedules in the future. When there is a problem, you need the available time and energy to address the problem and its ripples.<\/p>\n

What I can tell myself is that I did my best for every student, especially those harmed by a peer\u2019s poor choices. Teaching evaluations seem to bear out that dedication, thankfully. It takes a lot of energy to be positive in class with turmoil outside the class.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For the last few months I haven’t had much time for blogging, or even quiet reflection on life. This was an overwhelming semester, and I am surprised that I managed to function through the last 16 weeks without total collapse. Partial collapse has followed, though. This semester was too much.…<\/p>\n

Continue ReadingEnd of Semester Reflections<\/span> <\/i><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":4014,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"iawp_total_views":10,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4,7],"tags":[151,227,253,459,679,699,705,742],"class_list":["post-213","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-education","category-health","tag-classrooms","tag-disruptions","tag-empathy","tag-mental-health","tag-students","tag-teaching","tag-tenure","tag-universities","entry"],"yoast_head":"\nEnd of Semester Reflections - The Autistic Me<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tameri.com\/autisticme\/2015\/01\/06\/end-of-semester-reflections\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"End of Semester Reflections - The Autistic Me\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"For the last few months I haven’t had much time for blogging, or even quiet reflection on life. 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