Last updated on December 19, 2023
As we approach the last week of September 2023, I can reflect on the return to school for the girls and me, declaring that survival mode exhausts the entire family. Yes, we’re in survival mode, and it’s a lot like hanging on to a rope suspended above a dark, bottomless pit of despair.
Leigh broke her hand on Thursday, September 14. Although I thought about taking her to the emergency room that night, I waited until after school on Friday. It turned out to be a serious complete fracture along her left hand’s pinky finger. I feel horrible that I didn’t act sooner since I wondered if it might be broken.
The injury means Leigh cannot participate in the swim team for six weeks. This also limits her participation in band, which annoys her. Leigh’s left-handed and loves art. She’s adapting by creating art on the computer and typing for school using her right hand.
At least she’s doing well academically in middle school. Leigh works hard and does her best. She has earned excellent grades. We are proud of her.
Anne struggles with impulse control at school. We had her initial IEP meeting, and the Individualized Education Plan (or “Program”) from previous years is in place until the school conducts new assessments. Her struggles with ADHD and other challenges result in conflicts with other students and some teachers. To describe her situation as “complicated” fails to capture our desperation.
Elementary school is a battle for Anne… and with Anne. We, and her teachers, have to push her along or drag her along. I’m not sure which it is. I do know that we cannot keep doing this through high school. She does not want to do the work, no matter what potential rewards are offered. She hates any task that isn’t play. Not every lesson can be turned into a game, nor will every teacher acquiesce to her demand to be entertained.
The special education teachers use points and rewards to motivate the children. I have mixed feelings about this. At the same time, it isn’t working. She wants the prizes; she doesn’t want to earn them.
We cannot homeschool Anne anymore. She has to learn to follow rules and respect adults. She has to learn to collaborate with peers and treat them with kindness.
And then, there’s my situation at the university. I’m commuting twice a week this semester and three next semester. I’m on the road from 7:45 until 10:20 a.m. on those mornings. I stop halfway between home and College Station to use the restroom and stretch. I hurt enough that I am nauseous most mornings. The drive home is easier because I can stop for as long as needed.
I have five classes, and it seems I’m constantly grading assignments — at home and in my office. I barely manage to prepare lessons for the classes. I am getting on track, but it isn’t easy. Sleep? What’s that?
There’s a lot more going on in our lives, too. We’re tired as a family. The stress meter is at 11 on the best days this school year.
We are surviving. That’s where we are after the first full month of school.