Last updated on November 26, 2023
I entered the University of Southern California in 1987 as a quad major. That eventually was reduced to a double major in print journalism and English education, though I came frustratingly close to a general science degree for teaching science.
Now, three decades later, I have been a substitute public school teacher, a part-time college instructor, a teaching assistant, a graduate assistant, a visiting professor, and an adjunct. Only briefly was I an assistant professor, in a program with too few students to support the course offerings.
The reasonable question to ask, and one I have asked constantly for 30 years, is, “Why do I keep trying to teach?” My reasons include:
- The enjoyment of teaching and the time I spend with students.
- The schedule, with breaks, which allows me recovery time, something few other professions offer.
- The realistic option teaching offers most creative writers, who cannot survive on writing alone.
- The financial security promised if you attain tenure.
I have admitted before, I’d often rather sit at home and write than have a standard career. Home is safe, quite, and controlled. But, I also needed a stable career and truly enjoy teaching.
Now, I’m much older and that career proved too elusive. Any career proved elusive.
I did try the “make your own career” approach, and that cost my wife and I a lot of time, money, and heartache. I do not have the social skills that an entrepreneur needs and neither does my wife. Introverts need an extrovert business partner.
These must be my final months pursuing an academic career.
The adoption of our foster daughters was delayed, so I politely declined interviews in other states. Until we are their legal parents, I have learned not to assume adoption is just around the corner. Last year, I thought the adoption process would be completed before July or August (2017). It wasn’t, and I already know I don’t want to relocate without my family. I could handle a month or two, maybe three, but not a year without my wife and daughters.
I’ve had interviews and campus visits, but no solid employment offer. It seemed like I was close a few times. Twice I was asked about possible salary requirements and anything else I might require. In both instances, I referenced what I had earned as a full-time professor and offered an average of those annual salaries. I never heard back — no follow-up at all.
Without an academic home, I am still putting together proposals and writing draft papers, alone and in collaboration with others. Desperation or delusion or something. I had imagined a job offer for 2018-19, so I kept moving forward with submissions. Reality is taking hold. Hard to admit the truth, sometimes, especially when the truth is a lot of time, money, and energy invested in a career path that was not to be.
I was never great at anything, but I am a good teacher. The evaluations of colleagues and students reflect the quality of my teaching and scholarship.
That wasn’t enough to find a career path.